Before you…Words of Advice

"Before you act, listen. Before you react, think. Before you spend, earn. Before you criticize, wait. Before you pray, forgive. Before you quit, try." - Ernest Hemingway
Words of Advice

Popular journalist Ernest Hemingway wrote this quote. How many times have you opened up your mouth too soon before speaking and get yourself into a whole lot of trouble? There is a zen quote that talked about thinking carefully before speaking and of course the famous three gates quote.

“Before you act, listen,” They say that in order to be successful you have to have the ability to act quickly and decisive but wouldn’t that contradict this? No, not really. Successful people have the ability to quickly make decisions by drawing on their past experiences and already knowing their surroundings and always paying attention (“Listening”) to everything going on around them. Another quote, “He who hesitates is lost” is also a contradiction to this quote, but I feel this quote only applies if you already draw on your past experiences, paying attention (“Listening”) to your surroundings, know everything going on around you but are hesitant because you are afraid of the circumstances. At that point, you may lose your chance for an opportunity if you look into these quotes deeper.

“Before you react, think” I’m guilty of this one. My face and body language react much faster than me thinking it through. This creates a misinterpretation if my first reaction does not match what I process (think) about a split second afterward and of course, makes a mess of things when trying to get points across from either side. It takes practice but now that you are aware of it you can catch yourself the next time and realize what you are doing. The more times you catch yourself the easier it will be to stop doing that seemingly automatic response the next time. One thing you can try is to think like Spock and just raise an eyebrow. That makes your reaction questionable about what your reaction is really about. This will give you time to think about it at least.

“Before you spend, earn” You would think this one would be obvious but many people have the idea, “How can I be out of money! I still have checks left!”. Robert Kiyosaki the author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad. (Good book by the way even though he supports Trump) talks about how you should never borrow money unless you are making money from it. An example of this is if you want to buy a house on a nice lot of land make sure that you buy a big enough plot of land that you can sell to someone else on land contract. That way his payments to you would cover the payments of your loan and if they stop payments and leave then the money that you received from them would be free and clear then you can sell it to another interested party and start over again. On the Zen thought of this is to of course live as simply as possible. I remember a short Zen story of living simply because we are only here temporarily. Wayne Dyer has often said that if you get rid of more material possessions then you will have that much less to clean, maintain, repair, and insure that will ultimately give you more peace of mind. This part of the quote should be expanded to, “Before you spend, earn, think if you really need it, think if it would be the extra trouble down the road to maintain and insure it, and think if the money could be put to better use, elsewhere.”

“Before you criticize, wait” Maybe you shouldn’t criticize at all. What is the person that you are talking to you like? Can they handle constructive criticism? Some of the best teachers I know will bring up stories of their past or stories of someone else they know that matches the current situation so that the person they are talking to does not take things personally. Some people seem almost impossible to talk to because they take things so personally and this is a good method of teaching. Plato had a great way of teaching that would also help in this situation. He never told his students anything but would rather ask them questions instead so that they had to come up with the answer themselves. (I have a spirit guide that never speaks but makes me come up with questions instead and then only smiles when I seem to be going down the path.) Once the student comes up with the answer on their own they are more likely to remember the answer than when someone tells them the answer.

“Before you pray, forgive” Prayer for many people is like asking for something from a great vending machine in the sky. Praying should be for someone else or for asking guidance on how to solve your own problems. Forgiving before you pray helps clean the slate for doing a proper prayer or meditation. Wayne Dyer said that if praying is talking to God then intuition is God talking to you.

“Before you quit, try” I see too many people with not enough drive or ambition to keep going. After all, it’s never crowded along the extra mile (A great book by Wayne Dyer). Sometimes you have to step back when things are not working and try a different approach. Do not be like the fly trying to leave out the window and keep hitting the glass! Don’t ask yourself the wrong questions like, “why is this not working?” but instead ask yourself, “how can I make this work?” Asking yourself the right questions will help put your mind and body in a better state of mind that will make you succeed better. Tony Robbins has many books that help you with this.

 

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